Step 01

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Pam's recovery journal's picture

my opiate addiction

Step Number: 
Topic: 
Surrender
Question: 
What am I afraid of about the concept of surrender, if anything? What convinces me that I can't use successfully anymore?

the main thing that convinces me that i cant use sucessfully anymore is the fact that i dont like who i became when i was using. i lied to everyone around me including those whom i loved the most.

Pam's recovery journal's picture

my opiate addiction

Step Number: 
Topic: 
Surrender
Question: 
What am I afraid of about the concept of surrender, if anything? What convinces me that I can't use successfully anymore?

the main thing that convinces me that i cant use sucessfully anymore is the fact that i dont like who i became when i was using. i lied to everyone around me including those whom i loved the most.

Pam's recovery journal's picture

my opiate addiction

Step Number: 
Topic: 
Moving on
Question: 
How do I know it's time to move on?

tuesday 12-9-16    days clean - 51

Pam's recovery journal's picture

my opiate addiction

Step Number: 
Topic: 
Moving on
Question: 
How do I know it's time to move on?

tuesday 12-9-16    days clean - 51

Licimariequintas's picture

10 ways my life has become unmanageable due to drugs and alcohol

Step Number: 
Topic: 
Unmanageability
Question: 
Custom question

1. I couldn't take care of my kids
2. I couldn't pay my bills
3. I couldn't keep a job
4. I couldn't feed myself
5. I couldn't stop doing drugs or drinking alcohol
6. I couldn't stop making drugs

I'm still chained with my own shackles of addiction.

This is my first time posting. I'm not sure if I'm doing this right either. So excuse me if I'm wrong. 
I've never been to a NA meeting. I want to go but am scared to go alone. I know until I do then ill never get a sponsor nor will I find my recovery. Yes, I'm still an active user. I don't want to be. I miss my 14 month old daughter and want to see and hold her. I'm tired of being a slave to heroin. 
asobermamaw's picture

How am I powerless

Step Number: 
Topic: 
The disease of addiction
Question: 
What does "the disease of addiction" mean to me?

  The disease of addiction means to me to never have another easy day. To never have another day free from thinking about getting and using drugs. The disease of addiction is like a death sentence to me.

asobermamaw's picture

How am I powerless

Step Number: 
Topic: 
The disease of addiction
Question: 
What does "the disease of addiction" mean to me?

  The disease of addiction means to me to never have another easy day. To never have another day free from thinking about getting and using drugs. The disease of addiction is like a death sentence to me.

kat2488's picture

My powerlessness

Step Number: 
Topic: 
Powerlessness
Question: 
Over what, exactly, am I powerless?

Powerless from getting myself out of this deep black hole.

No control over thinking I need a substance to make me feel better

loss of control from doing what I say and doing what I say

To be continued....

Who is in the mirror?

I find myself looking inward over the past few days, and to be honest I have no idea who I am seeing in the mirror.  I see an adict, a lyer, thief, and many other horrible things.  Finally reaching the point of being sick and tired, and wanting to see my old self again I called my doctor today and for the first time, I admitted to having a problem and to see what options I have.  After a bit I found out they will send me to a outpatient clinic where I will be given medication to help with the problem, also I will attend meetings, drug test, and even a shrink to help with other issues which

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